In recognition of National Domestic Violence Awareness Month, I'm going to approach the topic of domestic abuse/violence just a tad by also relating my last dance performance to the topic, since I had this issue in mind while I was creating it.
I choreographed this specific piece for the 9th Annual Mynx Pole Dance Extravaganza, which happens to raise funds for the Sexual Assault Victims Care Unit of Call For Help Inc., which provides services and counseling for victims of rape, incest, molestation, harassment or other sexual assault. Unfortunately, sometimes the offenders of sexual assault are people who the victims know. This brought me to thinking about domestic abuse, which is related, since sexual assault can be a form of domestic abuse/violence.
My intention for this performance piece was to call out the darker side of relationships and domestic abuse as a thing that actually happens (I sadly know loved ones who have been victims of it), even though those who are caught up in it often stay hidden or keep things behind closed doors for whatever reasons (i.e. "keeping up appearances," children being involved, feeling trapped and that they have no other options, safety reasons, etc.). This is my way of saying that their pain is real; it exists and it's valid. However, it is easier than people realize to get caught up in an abusive relationship, especially since some forms of abuse are more subtle or underhandedly manipulative. Here is the "Power and Control" wheel that is sometimes used to talk about these forms of abusive manipulation.
In order to express this topic via the art of performance, I decided to use a cover of the song "Cherry Wine" by Hozier.
Here are the lyrics:
"Her eyes and words are so icy
Oh but she burns
Like rum on the fire
Hot and fast and angry as she can be
I walk my days on a wire.
It looks ugly, but it's clean,
Oh momma, don't fuss over me.
The way she tells me I'm hers and she is mine
Open hand or closed fist would be fine
The blood is rare and sweet as cherry wine.
Calls of guilty thrown at me
All while she stains
The sheets of some other
Thrown at me so powerfully
Just like she throws with the arm of her brother.
But I want it
It's a crime
That she's not around most of the time.
The way she shows me I'm hers and she is mine
Open hand or closed fist would be fine
Blood is rare and sweet as cherry wine.
Her fight and fury is fiery
Oh but she loves
Like sleep to the freezing
Sweet and right and merciful
I'm all but washed
In the tide of her breathing.
And it's worth it, it's divine
I have this some of the time.
The way she shows me I'm hers and she is mine
Open hand or closed fist would be fine
The blood is rare and sweet as cherry wine."
In my performance, I'm wearing a white shirt (representing the innocence and naiveté at the beginning of a relationship). The relationship seems so sweet and passionate at first, but it's as if the relationship starts possessing her, and before the victim knows it, she looks back in the mirror and sees all the damage that has been done (stained with red). At the end of the piece, she asks for help, which is SO IMPORTANT. Yes, humans can be independent and tough, but seeking help and resources is SO SO SO SOOOOO IMPORTANT. For example, there's even a National Domestic Violence Hotline.
Anyway, that's some of my spiel about all this, but the internet is chock full of resources for those who want to learn more, especially if you think that you sense that a loved one or even you might be involved in a relationship that should be of concern. OR even if you find yourself being toxically manipulative of loved ones, that's also good to be aware of and address. If you truly love someone, you'll want no harm to come to them.
Here is my performance piece: